A while ago, I was discussing my parenting struggles with a wise friend.
I was sharing that I could pretty much figure out how to deal with any one child at a time, but the part that gets really stressful is when all the kids need me at once…
For example, when I pick them up from school after a long day, and they each want my full attention right away, so that they can tell me about the ups and downs of their day… That’s where I get overwhelmed! That’s where it feels impossible!
She asked me,
“So do you feel that there really needs to be five of you? That what your kids really need is for you to clone yourself and give each of them your full undivided attention all the time?”
Of course that sounded ridiculous!
And so I suddenly had this paradigm shift!
No! My kids do NOT each need to have their own mother! No, I did not do any injustice to my kids by giving them siblings!
If Hashem wants us to have big families, then it means that it’s HEALTHY for kids to grow up with brothers and sisters, and to share their parents’ time and attention with however many siblings!
It means that whatever I am able to give them, IS enough for them!
I am not meant to be a magician/Wonder Woman/ miracle worker! I am not meant to multiply myself or have 100 hours in my day!
The amount of time I have is enough for the amount of kids that I have, and is enough for all of their needs!
The fact that until now they FELT that they weren’t getting enough is only because they were reflecting MY own feelings!
And so the moment that I stop feeling guilty, and instead, start feeling fully confident that I am giving them ENOUGH, and that it’s perfectly normal and healthy for them to be patient and take turns and figure certain things out on their own -
Then they will immediately feel the same!
And Baruch HaShem it was amazing to see how true this realisation was! How quickly the kids picked up on my new attitude and reflected my new belief!
***
And I realised, the same is true about bringing Moshiach!
We need to stop (subconsciously) expecting ourselves to be superwoman and do the impossible!
We need to stop assuming that the fact that we don’t yet see Moshiach, proves that we are not yet deserving!
We need to stop believing that we have not yet done “enough” to bring Moshiach!
*Because WHO decides how much is ENOUGH?*
Yes, The Rebbe told us to do all that we can to bring Moshiach!
But the Rebbe told us to do all that we CAN - not to do what we can’t! Not to do the impossible!
And the Rebbe said to do all that WE can - not to worry about what others are doing, or not doing…
And we have already done all we can!!!
The fact that we have not done more is because we are human!
Hashem KNOWS all the reasons why we haven’t done more! He knows all the reasons why we haven’t done better!
He’s the One who set us up that way!
He’s the One who gave us a yetzer hara and created us with imperfections!
He knows that we have done the best that we could -
With the tools that we had,
With the knowledge that we had,
With the time that we had,
With the inner strength that we had…
So maybe it’s US who need to do the forgiving!
Maybe the moment that WE stop feeling guilty, and instead, start feeling fully confident that we have fulfilled our Shlichus to the best of our ability, considering all the surrounding circumstances…
Maybe THAT is the moment when Hashem will immediately reflect the same!
דע מה למעלה - ממך!
Know that what goes on above, depends on you!
Maybe the Heavenly court is waiting for US to rule that we are deserving!
We may not be Rabbanim, but we are still part of the Beis Din Shel Mata.
Our thoughts and our words still have power!
And we can still make our own ruling!
The Rebbe already announced that we finished Avodas Habirueim, that we already did teshuva, that we already had enough Mesiras nefesh, that we already had ahavas chinam…
The Rebbe was already “Dan lechaf zechus” that it’s not our fault when we give up searching…
So maybe what’s left is for US to agree!
For US to recognise our own merits!
For US to decide that we are not guilty, and that we don’t need any more zechusim…
For us to confidently tell both ourselves and Hashem that YES,
We ARE worthy!!!
We ARE good enough!!!
We HAVE done enough!!!
We HAVE completed our Shlichus!!
We ARE ready!!!
& We demand Moshiach NOW -
BEFORE this Yud Aleph Nissan!
No comments:
Post a Comment